Sunday, January 10, 2010

Singleness -- A Blessing, Not a Disease

Recently, I read this wonderful quote: “Don't settle for the one you can live with, wait for the one you can't live without.” The message seems so simple and obvious, but recently I have had various friends get engaged, and there seems to be a cloud looming above me to jump on the bandwagon and settle down. I was listening to an Austin Stone sermon from 2/8/09 about being single, and I have decided to try to embrace my independence and let God’s will be done in His time. After all, as Matt points out, singleness can be a blessing, although our culture treats it more like a disease.

In 1 Corinthians 7:7-9, Paul writes, “But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. But God gives to some of us the gift of marriage and to others the gift of singleness. So I say to those who aren’t married to widows – it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.” Although Paul’s purpose is not to tell people that marriage is a bad thing, he illustrates that being without a partner does not mean that you have to be alone, as we are always with Christ.

The Bible mentions two main blessings of singleness, the first being that it gives us the opportunity to offer undivided, undistracted devotion to the Lord. In 1 Corinthians 7:32-35, Paul writes the following: “I want you to be free from the concerns of this life. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. But a married man has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. In the same way, a woman who is no longer married or has never been married can be devoted to the Lord and holy in body and in spirit. But a married woman has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please her husband. I am saying this for your benefit, not to place restrictions on you. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best with as few distractions as possible.”

The second blessing that accompanies singleness is that it offers a blessing that, according to God’s word, is eternally better than the earthly blessing of children. In Isaiah 56:1-5, it is written that the Lord said to “Be just and fair to all, do what is right and good, for I am coming soon to rescue you and to display my righteousness among you. Blessed are all those who are careful to do this. Blessed are those who honor my Sabbath days of rest and keep themselves from doing wrong. Don’t let foreigners (us) who commit themselves to the Lord say, ‘The Lord will never let me part of His people.’ And don’t let the eunuchs (those who chose to remain single) say, ‘I’m a dried-up tree with no children and no future.’ For this is what the Lord says: ‘I will bless those eunuchs who keep my Sabbath days holy and who choose to do what pleases me and commit their lives to me. I will give them –within the walls of my house – a memorial and a name far greater than sons and daughters could give, for the name I give them is an everlasting one. It will never disappear!” This promise from the Lord is very significant, as carrying on the family name by having offspring was a big deal during this time. For example, in 1 Samuel 24:21, Saul asks King David to “Swear to me that by the Lord that when that happens you will not kill my family and destroy my line of descendants!”

Although I may continue to daydream about my perfect wedding, this sermon really helped me to realize that I need to wholeheartedly accept that God has a wonderful future in store for me (Jeremiah 29:11), and that my singleness is a part of His master plan. Instead of worrying about being lonely, I need to remind myself that I am never alone. Lastly, I need to celebrate the fact that I am more readily able to focus all of my attention on the Lord in this time when I am not distracted by another worldly love.

In His name,
Ailee

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